Tick tock (Concluding story)

Tick tock (part 3)

“Even when the Jury and the judge say you have the right to bear a grudge, it’s the whisper in your ear saying set it free...” Forgiveness – Matthew West

“I am not dying Priscilla.” He said.

That made me smile. After all these years, George could still read my mind. My friends think I have an inscrutable face. Not George, he could always call my bluff.

“Poker night is not the same without you George.” I said

He smiled and his mouth curved up in that slightly crooked way that always made me want to reach out and straighten his lips. To fix his smile. Mum said that I needed to work on my obsessive compulsive need to fix everything and everyone around me. She said that was one of the reasons why my marriage was crumbling. I did not believe that for one second. George and I both knew why our marriage had crumbled.

He had cheated.

Not today Priscilla. Not when George has gone out of his way to celebrate our wedding anniversary.

I had never forgiven him. How could I? I had trusted him, I had been faithful to him but he had thrown everything away because of a cheap...

I tried to focus on the overpriced duck meal in front of me to keep from remembering the lies, the betrayal, the...

“You look very lovely tonight Prissy... ”

“Thanks George. I wish I could return the compliment but you look awful. What’s the problem?" I reached across the table and held his hand in mine,"Talk to me.” 

“I am okay... It’s just that I have been doing a lot of thinking and it’s probably taking its toll on me.”

I held his hand and we were silent for a while.

He looked down and noticed the bracelet.

He looked at me and for a moment, a thousand words were exchanged as we gazed into each other’s eyes without saying a word.

Finally, he broke the silence. “Let’s take a walk Prissy, it’s been so long.”

I wasn’t exactly wearing the right shoes or clothes but there was no way I was going to say no to that.

Just tonight Prissy, let down your hair and let the wind kiss your face. Tonight, forget about the past and do not worry about the future. Tonight, pretend you are two young lovers stranded in a strange city with nowhere to go but the streets. Tonight, let’s play make believe that he is yours and you are his. Tomorrow... tomorrow would take care of itself.

Truth is I had missed him.
I missed arguing over the TV remote, I missed his special Saturday morning breakfast meals which were usually inedible, I missed our long aimless evening strolls. I missed my husband.

“Promise me you will still love me when I’m grey and old and wrinkled” I had demanded

“I will baby, I promise” He had replied shortly before scooping me in his arms and covering my lips with his.

The guests had burst into loud encouraging cheers. Well, everyone except the minister who kept clearing his throat and did not look at all amused when I stole a glance at him after the long kiss - He had not yet given the permission to kiss the bride.

Exactly ten years today.

We walked for a while, holding hands and not saying much. It was a beautiful night and I guess neither of us wanted to spoil it by saying the wrong word.

“We need to talk Prissy.” He finally said. He sat on the park bench and I sat down beside him

Midnight had come too soon for Cinderella.

“Where do we go from here? I can’t take it anymore...” He started.

My heart sank

“We need to make a decision... and it’s not easy. I know some couples that have not been through half of what we have been through and they got divorced... some have even found love again” He continued.

My heart sank further

“What are you trying to say George? Do you want a divorce?” My voice sounded very strange even to my own ears.

He was silent for a while.

“Yesterday, I was ready to throw in the towel. Before then, I’m sorry... the only reason I had for staying in this marriage was that I was raised Christian and divorce is a no-no...”

“That’s no reason George. We both haven’t been in a church since forever...” I replied.

“I wonder if that is where we started getting it wrong” He said

I looked at my husband in disbelief.  “Church failed us” I practically shouted. “Where was God when you lost your job? When we had to practically beg for food from the neighbours? When Jumoke was hospitalised and we nearly lost her? Where was God when in the midst of all these troubles, we had the miscarriage? When the one thing that could have brought us joy was taken away from us? Where was He?”

“What if He was right there beside us Prissy? We survived. I was talking to Julius yesterday and he said the Bible never said storms won’t come. As long as we are on earth, there will be challenges, but He will see us through them. And we have been blessed Prissy...”

“This is rich George coming from you... you cheated remember? Now suddenly, you are a pastor” I challenged.

The moment I said those words, I wished I could take them back. He looked so deflated...

“I’m sorry George.”

He sighed. “I wish I could go back and change the past, Prissy. I made a huge mistake and I am really sorry. I only wish you could forgive me. I know it looks impossible now... But I think if God hates divorce then He must have a way to save even the most hopeless marriage, to make a way even when they seem to be no way. Last night, Julius prayed with me and I rededicated my life to God. I don’t want to lose you Prissy and I want to try again”

“We have tried everything...” I started

“We haven’t tried God...” He said

Right there on the park bench, we closed our eyes and I said my first prayer in at least three years. We prayed in Jesus name committing ourselves, our marriage, broken dreams and everything into God’s hands. I asked God to forgive me and help me forgive George and myself. It felt awkward at first but I felt peace after the prayer.

It started raining and we had to call a taxi to take us home. By the time we got home, we were both drenched and shivering. I went straight to put the kettle to boil.

“How would you like your tea Mr Gee?” I asked

“Plain, darling. You are all the sugar I need” He drawled in reply

It’s been three years since that night and it’s been amazing.

1 Corinthians 13: 7 "Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful and endures through every circumstance."

Psalm 127:1 "Unless the Lord builds the house, the builders labour in vain."